by Nate Bakkum

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released March 11, 2017

Nate Bakkum – compositions, arrangements, vocals, synths, bass, programming

Aaron Grant – guitar
Jon Irabagon – saxophone
Jody Livo – violin
Andra Kulans – violin
Erielle Bakkum – viola
Melissa Bach – cello

Strings recorded at MINBAL (Chicago, IL)
Mixed and mastered by Benjamin Balcom

This project is partially supported by a Faculty Development Grant from Columbia College Chicago.



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Nate Bakkum Chicago, Illinois

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Track Name: In Context
behind closed doors
we disagree
breadcrumb trail
connecting me to you

back stage
out of frame
behind the lens
in silhouette

hoping that our compasses point to the same true north
wishing for that moment of pure light again

out of context it all sounds the same
Track Name: Golden Days
oh these golden days
we have chased a lifetime
in our separate ways
waiting for the right time

summer’s here at last
dazed from years of waiting
oh that golden sun
warm breath of nostalgia

golden glow
cloudless languid sky
when we’re gone
these will be the days remembered

on our darker days
seem to last a lifetime
dreading that cold rain
never see the sunshine

remember golden days
earned this satisfaction
they’ll be here again

and we’ll feel the breezes blow
lift the cold away
shut my eyes
I can hear you say you’ll come back

golden glow
cloudless languid sky
when we’re gone
these will be the days remembered
Track Name: Resolutions
this descent
doesn't end
spirals down

widescreen view
slow motion
watch us hit the wall

new year's day
last year's song
rings in our ears
hear the long, slow decay

strings come in
alright here

eyes shut tight
hum along
as it comes apart

we are all refugees
traveling by night
voices from down below:
“we'll be alright"

these resolutions aren't so new
the years an endless string of days
so we defend the status quo
rationalize but don't change

this descent
doesn't end
spirals down

widescreen view
slow motion
watch us hit the wall
Track Name: Hydroplane
out of control and
off the rails
sinking down
to the darkness
concrete shoes
this game is over
fish swim by
they contemplate us
no memory
of our bodies
from the surface
make a home

take up arms
march into battle
free your mind
wade into water
why oh why
do they still hate us?
fish swim by
they contemplate us
running shoes
it’s oh so windy
frozen tears
and burning lungs
from your body
lift your eyes
to the horizon

no traction on these tires
no light behind these eyes
no air inhaled our last breath
no memory of you
Track Name: Even If
sitcom logic ends
this can't be taken back
safety net gives way
we’re in free fall

not funny anymore
shouldn’t be this close
which of us believes
this is the way?

who are we?
how can we
go on down this road?
and distant
but we had a choice

steel ourselves for war
bitter taste of blood
hands up, begging for
this battle to end

recognize this face
know where it comes from
felt this pull before
feel it again

resist and
the blood on the leaves
this history
full circle again
Track Name: Cannonball
after all the plans are made
and all the ink is dry
the table set
you lose

cannonball beneath your chair
and thick smoke filling up the room
can’t see the door

complacent restraint
unlearn this fear
become the strength that she needs
become your self

after all the bills are paid
and there is nothing left
we pray for rain
once more

only want to teach them to
decide what’s right and wrong
in shades of gray
but we can't

look past
this shortsighted screen
unlearn this fear
become the light that they need
become your self

after all the truth comes out
and once the pain is dulled
regroup and try

keep up with appearances
swallow hard and grit your teeth
and smile

look back
on those wasted nights
look back on love
become the faith that you need
become your self
Track Name: Tight Space
used to think
I had this
in hand
figured out

don’t know how
we got here
squeezed in
this tight space

I ought to know
to take control
to cover you

want to run
build with you
stretch out
feel the day

here I stand
I’m frozen
locked in
this tight space

I’ve gone away
out of control
I’ve let you down

choices that I've made
under pressure
things I've left undone
out of time
questions I have raised
left unanswered
only one remains
Track Name: Give Up the Ghost
why won't you back down?
just accept your day has passed
nothing left to give
time to disappear
move on to another life
learn to be alone

why do you persist?
placing all your barriers
blocking every road
it’s not yours anymore
failure to imagine what
this place will soon become

set yourself free
give up
let go

you feel the rising tide
waves encroaching from all sides
paddling upstream
you know the game has changed
contradictions and mistakes
protecting what was yours

but it’s not yours
give up
let go

it’s not enough
that you've been here before
not good enough
pedal’s to the floor
you show your fear
and argue it’s unclear
give up the ghost
fade away and let us go